Friday, September 28, 2007

Blowing cold

I write this post wondering whether i burned my tongue or the roof my mouth. The culprit was by the way, not a hot lady (raunchy thoughts, huh), it was just some really hot food. The taste was anything but hot but then what can one expect in a canteen of a research institute. Having said that my performance in the gone-by exams was as tasteless as the aforementioned food.

I know that you don't give a damn about my screwed up grades, so why should i ? (wish it was really that easy). Anyway i would like to elaborate a bit on my quite dumb exploits during the course of my exams. First of all, gone are those days when i used to attend classes only for attendance, these days it seems that i even attend exams just for the sake of attendance. The only thing which i usually get right in the examination hall , is my signature on the attendance sheet.

This may feel funny but it damn sure ain't funny. So what do i do during the whole exam, i just keep pondering over how i managed to get myself into such a hopeless situation in the first place. May be this place ain't for me, may be i am so irresponsible or may be i should work hard the next time or may be i should just stop this non-sensical chain of may-be's.

Whatever i do or don't do, this blog will keep getting updated as long as i continue to stay in this non-hot college of mine. I am actually quite amazed that terrorists haven't struck during the past week when festivities reached a feverishly high state.


Australia to beat India in Bangalore.

Monday, September 24, 2007

What the Haq

What happened was nothing short of a sub-continental tragedy, which quite frankly made the match a parody of a "world cup" final. I know very well that some of you might label this match as the "greatest ever" but then it wasn't so enthralling for a neutral like me.

The way in which Misbah-Ul-Haq got out after playing a mature innings typifies the complete match. The contest was lop-sided for most of the second innings and the way in which the Indians allowed them to crawl back was not worthy of champions.

I personally think that Misbah is a big choker. He had earlier managed not to score off the last two balls and now this. On a more positive note, this match saw me predicting the right result for the first time.

So all of you Indian fans, drop your pants and dance away into the night coz you really deserve it for being such loyal supporters.

I hate to say it but - Chak De India !!

Saturday, September 22, 2007

India vs. Pakistan :(

I am not too pleased to watch these two teams go head to head in the final of a major tournament mainly because they are too inconsistent and more over there is no longer an enmity between the two sides. Gone are those good old days when the two teams always stepped on to the pitch daggers drawn. These are the boring days of the "bhai-bhai" relationship where they no longer even swear at each other.

No matter how dull it appears to be, i have no other option but to watch it, just because i have no work to do. If my memory serves right, the last time the Indians entered a final as favorites, was against New Zealand in the 2000 champions trophy held in Kenya. Interestingly, their last appearance in a major final also happened in the African continent in the form of the 2003 WC where they were overwhelming favorites to lose and lose they did.

The last time i predicted the outcome of an India's match, i thought they would win the deciding seventh one-dayer against England but sadly things didn't work out that way. This time around, i am again predicting an Indian win and i am doubly sure that they can pull it off.

P.s:- They had lost in that final to New Zealand having knocked out Australia in the quarters and RSA (Yuvraj had made his dazzling  debut in this series) in the semis but then history only repeats itself for losers like South Africa, not for winners like India.

I am amazed at my over-reaching modesty.

Errata:- India was the joint winner of the champions trophy in 2002 and the 2002 final was the last major final we entered as favorites.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Sports take a back seat (A welcome change)

I have my mid-sems from the day after the day after tomorrow and my preparation is as patchy as this opening sequence. This may not sound strange at all, since almost all of your friends must be humming these words in your ears 24 X 7. On the bright side, they will last for only three days and they will quite surely disappear into the distant horizons  of my mind, even before i realize what hit me.

I feel like a scavenger right now, feeding on the bits and pieces of wireless signals left unconsumed by my peers. This was supposed to be the case prior to the installation of the wireless routers (in my block) but my condition continues to be the same, thanks to the highly ineffective "state of the art" equipment. Having said that, scavengers tend to lose the art of appreciation after a course of time, which makes them incapable of even distinguishing between the good and rotten food.

Changing course, there happens to be a match between Australia and India tomorrow and i am completely undecided on which team to support (not that it matters :)). This lack of decisiveness stems out from the behaviour of some(two to be precise) of my friends in the aftermath of yesterday's match. It was not a big deal but then making mountains out of mole-hills is a lot of fun and that is what i intend to do.

Coming to these two sinners, one of them aspires to be a Swiss citizen but i don't think he will even be able to locate Switzerland on the world map. The other guy is as short as one can get, accompanied with an ever-present irritating giggle. I would really love to see Australia thrash India just for the sake of these chauvinistic guys.

New prediction:-

This tourney no longer deserves my prediction.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

We shot ourselves in the Foot (nothing new actually)

As i have predicted, my prediction has gone awfully wrong once again with the Proteas consipiring to cut short their own journey. Their performance was nothing but pathetic to the core. It is time for them to start looking for some flexible players. Their top three batsmen are as one dimensional as you can get. They can't even play responsible cricket and it is high time that AB is sent back to first class cricket to iron out his numerous technical flaws.

The other big mistake was of course dropping Kallis. They sorely missed his composure and i am pretty sure that he would have done a better job than Pollock, even with the ball. What's really disappointing is that this is the first and the last match we are going to lose in this tournament.

So moving on, in order to improve, they need to blend in some responsible players with these dashing players (who are capable of chasing 434 but are also quite capable of throwing it away just like today).

New prediction:-

I am too messed up to make one right now.

T20 (title's as short as the game)

The first thing which is crossing many a cricketing mind these days is "what is wrong with Pakistan ?". Not only did they manage to not chase India's 141, they also sent the pre-super 8 favorites Sri Lanka crashing out. The Pakistan team seems to have become some sort of a bogey team to the Lankans since they had earlier sent them out of the Champions Trophy where the Lankans were termed favorites by the "experts".

Speaking of Lanka, they seem more or less like the bygone South African team which used to win everything comfortably barring the crunch matches (of course). Coming to the Proteas, they happen to be the only unbeaten team so far (which can be largely attributed to the quality of the teams they faced). As of now, they are on course to meet Australia in the semis which threatens to be a mis-match much like the earlier WC semi-final. They would be better off facing Pakistan instead, which is possible if they lose to the Yuvraj XI in a calculated fashion.

So  what about Pakistan, the biggest surprise package of the tourney. I feel that they have been pretty lucky so far and a place in the finals would be completely unjustified simple because of their ever-consistent inconsistency.

My prediction :-

Australia to win beating NZ/Ind in the final having beaten RSA in the semis.

p.s: I believed Sri lanka to win the cup initially, and to tell you the effectiveness of my predictions, i had two years earlier managed to  get all the 4 semi-finalists wrong in the champions league even after watching the first leg of their  respective quarter-finals.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Unworthy of a title

I always get that feeling of envy whenever i watch the people involved with Discovery channel. The reason not being their abundant uni-dimensional knowledge but the jobs they get to do. If i had it my way, then i would happily roam about as a part of their exploration entourage provided, they don't ask me to do the adrenaline pumping stuff (i am a born coward). I wouldn't even care for salary if provided with such an opportunity, which by the way is the only driving force for all professional geeks (opinions may vary).

So what is it that these non-geeks do ? (Geeks for me covers all people who work in the confines of a building). They just walk about happily in wilderness narrating something about the significance of some things which are unfortunately completely insignificant for the worthless money making clan of "professionals".

Having made some second-person observations, let me now step into the shoes of the first-person for a thankfully short duration. The first observation i make is regarding the human style of walking. I happen to believe that we move our hands in sync with our legs because we evolved from creatures which used to walk on all fours and since, old habits die hard, we are yet to stop moving our hands even though we needn't to.

On a more personal front, i happen to know three languages but when it comes to talking, i use only one. I do use the other two, but i happen to write more than i speak, in those languages. Having said/written that, i would also like to acquaint myself with Punjabi simply because it is an amusingly funny dialect.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

They ain't Chokers (anymore)

Every time a major cricketing event comes about, the only thing the papers talk about while referring to RSA is that "the time has come for them to shed their chokers' tag". Come on !, give them a break, they don't deserve that tag anymore. Gone are those days of despair, when they somehow managed to choke on the D-day after having dominated right through the tournament.

These days they hardly make it to the D-day, not because they are choking at a premature stage, but because they just don't have  enough ammunition in their bowling department to back up their ever so inconsistent batting line-up. The quota system in prevalance as of know only seems to be adding to their vows.

Speaking of quota, i wonder how Thsabalala made it into the team in the first place. The way he bowls is just like a lullaby to the opposition's batsmen.

Looks like nature's conspiring against me as well. As it stands right now, i will be unable to watch the match due to disruption caused to the cable lines by lightning.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

Two reviews and a preview

There is no need to buckle up your seats or anything, for the reviews, are for two completely insignificant man made creations. The first one amongst this happens to be FIFA 08 (demo version). Having been addicted to this game for the past season, i have to say that the new one ain't so different from the old one.

The major and most interesting change has to be the one done to the goal-keeper who has been designed to be a more pro-active figure unlike the previous editions where he almost never left his line. Since i have played only the demo version i haven't had a chance to find out about the new " Be a Pro" feature where you get to play with a single player for the whole course of the match.

Coming to the visual aspect, the turf seems greener and the stands seem fuller but the clarity has clearly gone astray. I am hoping that, that won't be the case with the full version.

The other review is concerned with the Tarantino part of " Grindhouse" namely "Deathproof ". True to his usual conventional style,Tarantino has managed to churn out yet another unconventional movie. (I am not complaining though)

The beginning part of the movie runs solely on the finer side of feminism (which happens to include some vulgar yet appealing body movements designed to present the character as bootylicious). The fun really begins in the "after six months" segment where the director moves away from the ladies' tushies (finally) to concentrate on some freaky car rides.

I would have dismissed this movie as thrash except for the last 30 mins which are really fun to watch. I would recommend this movie only to men, as women might find this one a bit offending. Go ahead gentlemen , have a blast :) .

Coming to the preview, i think that India will wrap up the series quite comfortably today. I don't know why, but as far as cricket is concerned , i tend to be unrealistically optimistic about India while being realistically pessimistic about South Africa.

Friday, September 7, 2007

Holy gay!!, I'm Straight

Before i begin, i would like to say that, my professors' bald heads are more interesting than the subjects they teach. Unfortunately for you people, i have nothing more to add on this as i have completely run out of demeaning phrases.

Changing tracks...

As it so very often happens on Orkut, i got a not so anonymous scrap from an anonymous person. The thing which makes it worth mentioning is, not the true identity of the anonymous guy but the ambiguity of his expressions as seen from the point of view of his scrap.

The scrap went something like " hii sexy, your profile is cool, but you are hot, how about becoming friends ".(It was actually a bit longer and a bit more obscene, i had deleted it immediately due to which i can't recall the complete details). To clarify things a lil bit, no picture of mine is available on the web, so his views can be classified under fiction (at least until he sees me :)). The thing in question however isn't how sexy i am, but what were his intentions.

The first thought that crossed my mind was pertaining the homosexual content in the scrap, but then in the positive sense,it might well be an in-experienced user of the English language who thinks that branding people sexy is a nice and easy way to pave way for friendship. These type of things usually happen when you use a foreign language. Actually, i am quite sure that most of you interpret my writings in a way different from mine, which may basically be attributed to the fact that I indulge in malapropism quite a lot.

Moving back to the contentious topic of homo-sexuality (luckily it ain't so conspicuous in India), i thought that it was restricted to the African-American tribes of USA and to some European countries. (But as you all know, the world doesn't adhere to my ideology)
As i say this, there happens to be a gay roaming amongst my not so unsuspecting batch mates. I shall not even begin to mention his name, but i can very well give you the name of my friend, PDSR, who happens to know a thing or two about the infamous exploits of the aforementioned person.

P.S:- If i had it my way, then i would banish all these crooked people to timbuktu.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

A few cheeky observations

In this edition of Rahul's blog, i would like to describe the various vagaries associated with watching an Indian cricket match in the T.V lounge. The thing most noticeable is, of course the partiality shown by my peers towards the Indian team. The most disappointing aspect of that happens to be that they don't even begin to appreciate the opposition's exploits on the field.

The other mentionable thing is their lack of knowledge about the game (the same cannot be said about their knowledge of Sachin though) . Half of them don't even realise that a batsman can't be given out on a ball which pitches outside the leg-stump (may be they just enjoy the game and don't give a damn about rules). The same thing sadly applies even to the football watching denizens of our institute who aren'e even aware of the away goals rule applied in the champions league.

Some of them even believe that we can restrict a team without taking any wickets and they think a run rate of 8 over 10 overs is more difficult than a run rate of 6 over 50. They think like what i used to some 10 years ago. May be all these years of  watching T.V has made me a pundit on the game (Too bad that the tables are turned when it comes to academics).

Frankly speaking, i have never been a fan of Indian cricket and i, more often than not, find my friends' antics more entertaining than the brand of cricket dished out by the Indian team. I, by the way, happen to support a certain team which goes by the name of South Africa ( Haven't i mentioned it already ?).

Being a supporter of the Proteas is not so fruitful as i don't get to see all of their matches. Having said that, i do have the option of going to my home to watch their matches. As a matter of fact, the only reason i go home these days is to catch some sporting events on T.V.

Switching back, why do captains always go for dumb field placements at the death. Why can't they see that they need to get their third-man finer when the batsmen begin to slog and why do they bother to bring in the fine-leg and thereby allow all of those cheeky shots. (A shot over the extra cover is more deserving of a four than the cheeky shots to the vacant fine-leg region)

Yesterday's match was quite reminiscent of England's earlier win against the Windies where Owais Shah and company managed to score some 70 odd runs in the last five overs to win the 20-20 tie, and most of the runs scored on that occasion were "cheeky" as well.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

On the verge of losing it

The other day i happened to receive a mail from one of the death-eaters which went like " your batch's performance has really been awful, so be prepared to repeat this course next year". Now hold on sir, first of all, your course comprises of nothing but reproducing a circuit already existent on the web. So what the eff (thought of cutting out the slang, eff here stands for FUCK by the way) are you yelling at ?

It's true that people like me can't even do that, but your course doesn't deserve a second try. There are other courses which i can think of tolerating for the second time, but if you ask me to repeat your course then i am pretty sure that my already precarious mental scale will shift permanently towards insanity.On that effingly sane note, i would like to end this one to one conversation.

Moving away from my impending date with insanity, let me share with you my views on a certain mythological being, born on this day. Funnily enough, i am discussing this, only to emphasize my hatred towards this guy (or whatever you wish to call him). The reason for my inbuilt hatred towards him, stems from the way in which he plotted the killing of my favorite mythological creation namely Karna.

So to sum up my post so far, i have criticized two beings quite unfairly, but then have you ever seen me praise anything ?

Ain't it ironic that this post should follow up my clarification where i mentioned that my posts aren't the byproducts of my frustration ?

Guess what, this one IS.