Methods that Aren't

What can an Institute do when it finds itself in the throes of economic distress. It can quite easily increase the fees and pass on the burden or, in a whole different plane of existence they can renounce all worldly possessions and continue to sit tight (pun intended).

So apart from the obvious what more can an Institute do gain some well-needed financial leverage. The following methods vary from the absurd to the true to the ones that are both

1) Every student giving a powerpoint presentation will be served an entertainment tax directly proportional to the duration of the presentation and the visual richness of the slides ranging from templates to images inserted and so on. A fixed base price is of course a must.

2) Why let all the vehicles into the campus without exacting any? Christen the entrance gate as a toll gate and make sure there aren't more than one entrances.

3) Maybe someone can look into the free unlimited web access and do something about it

4) When IPL comes to town next year, make sure to be there to collect your generous cheque

5) There's a TV show called Scrubs whose producers due to budget constraints decided to not include each protagonist in at least two of the season's episodes. Asking a couple of professors to take an unpaid leave every month might help. Of course, it is not implementable in colleges which have just the right number of professors. 

6) Instead of having a single technical cum cultural fest, a college can have two. This way more entertainment tax can be imposed. Introducing tickets for the events might also help but that might be against the very principles of having a celebration.

 7) If the college has a very well established sporting tradition with renowned trophy winning teams, sponsors for the teams' jerseys should be looked into. Football team, anyone ?

8) A college can always have a separate entrance exam and charge more than required. Getting a permission to do that might be difficult but proving that all students who come through the competitive exams aren't the right ones for upholding the ambitions of the institute might help. In fact, colleges aiming to turn their students into research scholars shouldn't participate with other run-of-the-mill degree offering and hand waving colleges.

9) Downsizing the staff might not be an option but cutting back on the number of air conditioners in a lab might help.

10) One can always go the EAMCET colleges way and put up some seats for auction.

11) A college can put up its hand and offer to train outsiders in various skills while completely turning a blind eye towards the qualms of the insiders regarding the intrusion.

12) With the sales of textbooks going down year by year due to e-books and students' apathy, it is high time a college gave away first hand books at a discount (sufficient enough to make profit both for the college and the seller).

13) A highly contentious but profitable move would be to introduce a contract where in the students when placed on campus must agree to donate some x% of their salary for their first year on the job. (Only implementable if the student goes on to take up the job acquired during the campus placements)

Time to conclude at lucky number 13. Have fun!

p.s:- With the organisers of Felicity '08 leaving, will blogging be of any essence ?

Possibly related post -> http://rauldegr8.wordpress.com/2008/08/26/rules-of-the-house-for-the-squatters-of-the-fifth-house-and-a-tag-line/

Weighty Issues

 

 

 

 

 

The other day i stumbled upon an article in the Time magazine which aspired to guide one in the science of 'how not be hated by potential friends on Facebook'. (No, I'm not going to copy paste the article.)

One among the many of "Facebook etiquette rules" was->' Stop taking quizzes. Nobody cares what literary time period you are'. I personally log onto FB not to cuddle up to potential friends and flaunt my impeccable personality and leave an impression, but to see if any of my friends have taken any interesting quizzes.

Of course, there are the self-propagating all time favorite quizzes on ones favorites but who doesn't like to share their interests and favorites. When we do that, we don't give a damn to what the others might think !, it's just all about us. It's our way of feeding our ego (which BTW is being wrongly portrayed in a very narrow and negative way in most circles). We do take some really lame quizzes like "who's your celebrity GF" and "which rock song are you" but this behaviour is much better than, not taking them due of the fear of making a bad impression on possible suitors.

In short, it's better to "be yourself and act as a jerk" rather than "pretend to be a sensitive saint". [The phrase "be yourself" has been thrown around many times that I feel like it might have robbed the chastity of the declaration and turned it into a skanky filmy line.] (I do hope that you are smart enough to realise that taking those quizzes didn't make you a jerk, it was just an expression)

------------------------------>Change of  Topic

 

I watched the palm d'or winning movie of last year "The Class" recently and was astonished at the way the student-teacher interactions were depicted. The movie shows 13 year olds refusing to do what the teacher says proclaiming "rights of expression" and "rights of freedom" and all that. I can't even begin to imagine that kind of free expressionism in our country. The students do cross the limits at times but that's not the point.

I reckon we have been corrupted ever since childhood into believing the restrictions posed on us are for our own good and that our tradition is the best in the whole wide world. There are two ways, i guess, of looking at our culture, those in favour may say it breeds discipline but the others might say it curbs our natural development. 

A typical students' life in India (not related to the above discussion or anything):-

Thrown into school even before they know how to use the toilet. Parents then proudly exhibit their childrens' talent by forcing them to recite multiplication tables and English alphabet in front of the neighbours with the sole purpose of showing how smart their child is. Boys don't even get the remark of "you throw like a girl" from their fathers. All they get is "do your homework ". Then as they grow older, the coaching institutes come along and the parents are only too happy to find a place which provides for maximum jail time. Career defining exams come, unable to cope students go.

[ I've said all that as an adult watching today's school going children. Our generation was caught up amidst this towards the fag end but we might just have escaped.]    

As someone said and my friend on Gtalk statused*-> The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.

P.S:- No matter what you write or do, how can IPL be not on your mind. Looking at AB, the customary " whom do girls ogle at" list for IPL came out and this was what was said about AB :-

If you like the choirboy type, AB is your baby. Incidentally he does sing, and while his debut single, "Show Them Who You Are", may not be the love song you were hoping for, it will work well enough to annoy your boyfriend no end. He looks like a dream and bats like a dream, so what if he doesn't sing like one, eh, ladies? 

The others on the list were Vettori, Dravid, Mccullum, Gayle, Sangakkara, Duminy, Pujara, Lee, Steyn, Dhoni (http://content.cricinfo.com/iplpage2/content/story/398866.html)

What's the fuss all about?

Guess what people, we at IIIT-Hyd are going to be honoured by the graceful presence of Y.S.R for our convocation ceremony yet again.  I don't know about the feeling outside but there is sure to be a lot of anti-incumbency if he continues to attend our ceremony,  so much  so that  we may decide to  exercise our voting  rights.

I don't know what it is about bunking classes that one gets so addicted to it . But then one should be modest enough to acknowledge the role played by the concerned professor in the whole process.  I attend classes not for the fear of having to pay the price but for the fact that i have already paid the price.

The latest Harry Potter media edition has managed to attract the attention of many adults but has failed miserably to sustain it, which was quite evident from the large number of adults who left mid-way through the film. It is quite dissapointing to see our grown-ups being caught up in this media endorsed madness.

Having come so far , i would like to take my leave, which would leave you wondering what's all this fuss about

Society......

My peers think that i am a lazy guy but the truth (acc to me at least) happens to be that i myself undermine my efforts where as they tend to glorify their achievements, when it comes to the field of hard work.

With that matter settled, let me share my views regarding the fat paychecks which are being rolled out to the IT professionals these days. Frankly speaking, they  don't deserve it especially in a poor country like India,  notwithstanding the "high" growth rates of GDP and other related stuff. I am saying this because i am personally involved in one such "highly rated" IT institute  and the work which we do wouldn't even classify as work if compared with the jobs that other people do.

I personally feel that farmers should receive a higher amount than we people just because they do the most important  work of the society which incidentally also happens to be the toughest. The way in which they are made to live their lives is terrible and the way in which they end it is even more so. One may rubbish his troubles and chide him for being illiterate but the truth is, there would be no farmers if they get education since they would gleefully join the IT circus then.

Speaking of education, we should move over from capitalism to communism mainly because the "better" ones keep getting the better oppurtunities where as the not so fortunate ( or unfortunate) ones get stuck with the next best options.

Coming to sports, Argentina have somehow conspired to choke once again on the big stage against the lacklustre  Brazilians  who earlier in the season had to sweat it out to earn a draw against an  equally insipid England team which can do well by borrowing some Irish spirit who are making waves in the cricketing circles with their performances.

Pollution..........

Gone are those over-populated days when lack of family planning was the buzz word for every problem faced by our society.The present situation calls for a restriction on the number of automobiles that a family can own, preferably a car per family .

The above restriction might be unthinkable for the " creamy " layer of the society but if we don't take such drastic steps then we wouldn't be able to take even a single step forward in the already over-whelmed road ways of Hyderabad. More importantly,the lone beneficiary of such traffic snarls happens to be our rather under-estimated friend Mr.Pollution, who with his ever-expanding wealth can buy all of our lives when we are auctioned by our very own earth.

Once that's done, we can anxiously look forward to the settling of various law suits filed by messrs, Hell and Heaven over the legality of the ownership of our souls.

Unrelated Irony:- The most happening phrase in the literary circles these days, happens to be "to use the cliche" which can be found preceding every cliche. It is being used so frequently that it can well become the fastest phrase to earn the title of a cliche.

Pointless

It is official folks, i am going nowhere. I signed a new deal earlier today which will see me stay here for atleast another six months, not that i had another choice but just in case.

Since i have not done anything today, i intend to describe a certain Vir Das who happens to be a Tv anchor
and is bound to give Cyrus a run for his money if he decides to really step in. Who is he?

He happens to host a program called " News on the loose" and if you wish, you can download his serioulsy funny wisecracks from virdas.com. He describes his web site as just another site on the web. Now, that may not be humility at its best but considering the web sites of some of my peers,thats quite a statement especially since all that one gets to see on people's personal sites is their name popping out from everywhere and running about mindlessly.This amazing phenomenon is amazingly prevelant in every page, very much like the corruption involved in all of our government papers.

Moving on to the print media, all that we get to see nowadays are news related to the not so lucky toddlers who end up
either being trapped in a bore-well or in swirling sewer, courtesy open manholes.These may be heart-wrenching for the near and dear but are somewhat amusing for the indifferent ones mainly because of the way they are telecast by the electronic media.

Gone are the good old days where one crossed the road after looking either side, these are the days in which one should also add a completely new dimension ,for who knows when a boarding might come crashing down to relieve you of your senses.