Sports and a Clarification

The dreaded day has finally arrived with Ole Gunnar Solskjaer deciding to let his frustration get better of him. This will draw the curtains on an illustrious career which in it's pinnacle gave the role of a substitute a whole new meaning.  His persistent alliance with injuries kept unleashing emotional havoc both within him and his numerous fans alike, towards the end of his career (could my elucidation stoop any further ?).

In case you haven't understood anything thus far, then you better start watching some football ! There is more to sports than just cricket, people (people here happens to be substituting Indians, of course).

The next person i am going to talk about is a tennis player whom, i know most of you people wouldn't know about. He happens to go by the name of John Isner, he is an American and has recently created a record for serving the most number of aces in a non-grand slam tournament (i haven't verified the authenticity of that record).He has already knocked out a seed in the opening round of the US open (which by the way wasn't the erstwhile Safin), his rise to fame has been meteoric and as a matter of fact dwarfs the achievements of Hamilton whose rise to fame can be solely attributed to the technology at his disposal.

Before i sign out, i would like to clarify that my posts are designed to be humorous and are not a manifestation of my frustrations as some of you believe. Maybe the fact that i don't use smileys has something to do with it but then using smileys would only de-value the seriousness of my comic ventures.

what i've done ??

In case you are a "proud" owner of an Ipod, then try to do the following. Firstly, select the settings option present in the main menu and then scroll down to set the shuffle option to off. Having done this, go back to the main menu and select shuffle songs.

If everything goes right, then something should be wrong with your ipod by now. I have tried this twice and on both occasions the device got stuck. I couldn't even switch it off !!

On the first occasion, i believed that my beloved had passed away but after waiting patiently for a whole day (during the course of which it was thrown about in frustration many a time) it finally got switched off. It had no other option actually, it had run out of charge.

Once it switches off, the battle is won because it starts to function properly after charging it. So before you try to do something stupid with your ipod, make sure that it has less back-up power.

The moral of the story happens to be that the best remedy for any electronic malfunction would be to restart the device. Too bad that the ipod doesn't provide us with this luxury because even the power off button ceases to function in such sticky situations.

Disclaimer:-

The title refers to my unwarranted foray into the technical world. I personally think that it would be better for my blog if i continue to stay away from such sticky situations [:)]

Cheap Shots

May be i should begin by apologizing for posting only two posts in the week gone by. I am, as a matter of fact quite prepared for that, with a bunch of excuses eagerly waiting to justify the slackness exhibited by me. First of all, the past week saw the beginning of the Natwest series, then there was a problem with LAN and more importantly many of my friends opined that i didn't have to update my blog so very often.

They even went on to point a finger (or rather criticized) at my tendency to express myself more through my writings than actual verbal conversations. So as a response to their feed-back, i have decided to point one (finger) back at them, but not the index to begin (shades of Slim Shady).

Shahrukh declared quite proudly in his movie that " woh kya hain, hamare hockey mein chakke nahin hote" , then what was he doing there in the first place. I would have dis-agreed with his satire on cricket except for the fact that there have been many a instance in recent times which show the questionable attitude of cricketers.

Top on my hit-list would be Jack Kallis who declared that he was contemplating his future with the South African cricket and that he had other offers waiting on the table. Doesn't playing for your country mean anything to you ? If all that you care about is money, then why don't you get yourself enrolled in your country's infamous club of criminals. I am sure that you will earn much more than you do at present, but the only thing is that you would have to improve your running between the wickets.

No wonder the New-Zealand cricket board wants the ICC to recognize ICL, so that they don't lose their star players (who also happen to be money gobbling whores). Now that i have delivered my fair share of cheap shots, let me share with you some of the cheap shots taken by others.

Top on this list have to be the terrorists who have taken yet another shot at claiming the lives of the not so innocent people. What's even cheaper is the way in which they execute these cheap missions. They planted 21 bombs of which only 2 exploded !! Taking into account their efficiency,it looks like they have done their graduation in electronics from my college.

Is night life worth livin' ?

We at present have deteriorated to a situation where we make Global warming the culprit from every untoward change in the climate conditions. It may be true or may be a false allegation or may be i should just shut up and get on with my job.

Let us for the moment assume that all the vagaries of climate are caused due to Global warming. Having assumed thus, it is now safe to say that it classifies as yet another misadventure embarked upon by our race. The first of these misadventures happened to take place when the early-man learned to live a more civilized life. The problem with being civilized is that we continue to manipulate our surroundings until we forget the feeling of being uncomfortable.

Anyone who's come across Charles Darwin in their secondary schools, know very well that evolution occurs only when a particular species doesn't feel comfortable in it's surroundings. So what we have actually done all these years is that we have prevented our evolution. Is it good or bad ? (I don't know man, i like the way i am)

So what does evolution have to do with Global warming ? It's just that we were so hell-bent in preserving our physical assets (no wonder we have beauty parlors all around) that we used all our mental abilities to invent everything we have today in a hurry. During this process, we also happened to let a lot of pollutants into the air (which is not our problem). The sad part now happens to be that we are fast running out of resources which act as our sources of pollution. (It is really an irony, that we are fighting to save something which will eventually kill us).

The simplest way to conserve our fuels would be by eliminating night life. Why can't you work in the day when you get sunlight for free , why waste electricity by staying up late into the night , why do big cities take bigger pride in their active night life. Is doing work in the night really necessary ?As far as i am concerned, the only work which has ever been done successfully at night is the process which leads to reproduction (even this is done with the lights off !!!).

So see to it that you don't stay up late in to the night unless you happen to be involved in a work which involves no usage of electricity [:)].

and one more thing for all the college going suckers....staying up late ain't cool, sleeping early ain't a crime, night-life is a truck load of shit (which by the way can be used as manure).

Disclaimer:-

The above views were expressed by an under-graduate in the engineering stream. So there is no reason for you to abandon your beliefs and concur with the ideas expressed.

Could you suggest one ?

The other day happened to be my birthday and it turned out to be eventful, for a change. To start with some of my not so public parts were given quite a beating, but the bigger pain in the arse was washing off the cake which sort of refused to let go of me. The aftermath of my hour long struggle for freedom against the aforementioned foe in chilly waters late in the night was that i felt not so healthy after waking up the following morning.

It didn't matter that much though as i rushed home to catch up with the latest gossips floating around in the world of electronic media. Even though i follow things other than sports, i would like to restrict myself to sports for the moment. Top on my agenda would be to lambast Nani who spent all his energy in fooling Sir Alex that he seems to have nothing left to show on the field. He is certainly a bigger flop than Shevchenko was with Chelsea last season.

Speaking of Sir Alex's naivety, his team lacks the willingness to work hard ala Mourinho's Chelsea (who were unjustifiably fortunate in securing a draw against a refreshingly entertaining Liverpool). I could go on forever but i guess the time's ripe to strip off my punditorial (made the word right now,derivative of pundit) behaviour.

On the day preceeding my b'day, i happened to watch Bourne Ultimatum (twice in fact) which, notwithstanding the rave reviews it has been receiving is bound to entertain only the Bourne faithful. To sum it up, it's just a typical Bourne movie (which makes it all the more enjoyable actually).

The best news i have heard so far this season happens to be the induction of Lance Klusener (my all-time favorite) into the clan of ICL which by the way will enable me to catch him live (on Tv atleast).

Send in suggestions befitting the title.

Thou Shalt be criticised, execise Caution

The first two papers that i faced were so easy that i felt like a batsman dismissed without having faced a ball on a belter of a pitch. I don't know what the death-eaters had in mind whilst preparing the question papers.

Hold on my dear "friends", you needn't cast your green eye upon me, for i have only managed to churn out yet another insipid performance at the examinations (which i am sure would make you selfish buggers happy). By the way, i had always had this tendency to term papers damn easy even though i could score only 50% in them.

Come on my dear friends, you and i know very well that the only way to proceed forward is by trampling others. So please don't even bother to bring up this topic when you meet me the next time and more-over, never try to justify your selfish actions because they would only make you look even more Scroogy.This ain't a personal crusade, i am just writing this to fill up some of the lines of my usually light-hearted blog.

I am sure that this blog won't go down well, because you happen to be filled to the brim with arrogance, to swallow this bitter pill. The thing which really irritates me is your lack of courage to tell the truth. Why will i give a shit to how you perform, so why not tell the truth!!!!!

I know that you don't deserve this criticism, but what to do,this happens to be the theme of this blog. Exploring these sort of negative thoughts is bound to expand the horizon of my blog. Don't even begin to think that i am in a foul temper, as a matter of fact i am over-joyed at my new found ability of making others feel dumb ( and myself dumber). If you happen to think that i am lying, then i guess that's just a reflection of your cockiness.

Never ever think that you can read the other guy's feelings because you are, after all just a mortal stuck in a world filled with hypocrites. I would have liked to make this one a bit more humorous, but then it would have stolen the sting of my verbal volleys.

Diclaimer:-

Three cheers people, i meant no offense whatever, for i live a wonderful life in a wonderful world filled with wonders like you (don't even begin to think that i meant it)

Misfiring Manchester

The season is only two rounds old but the start made by Manchester United indicates that they are back to their days of unpredictability unlike a Chelsea or Arsenal who are quite predictably boring. Liverpool on the other hand seem to be a mixed breed. They are unpredictable but predictably boring.

The bigger problem though seems to be the suspension of Ronaldo for the next three matches. He is such a talent that he can't be replaced by anyone in the squad of Man Utd unlike Rooney (who is btw out for 2 months) who can be replaced by dime a dozen players. As far as i am concerned, Rooney ain't such a great player as the English press makes him out to be. He may be the best English striker but he is way behind the strikers from the rest of the world.

Lately my mail box is being littered with so many "lottery winner" mails that if they were true, i would have had enough money to buy the Man Utd club from the Glazers. The first thing which i would do then would be to buy Alexandre Pato from Ac Milan and then fire Sir Alex for stagnating the club with his seemingly end-less presence.

Disclaimer:-

Matches of Chelsea and Arsenal aren't so boring, it's just that i don't support either of them.