Champions League

The latest midweek midnight offerings of the champions league were all about mistakes and the biggest of them all was the presence of three premier league teams in the semi-finals. The premier league teams are surely the strongest in the world but considering the fact that their national team is the weakest, it is but a mistake that they be so dominating.

Premier League is supposedly the best league in the world and Manchester United is undeniably the best team in this league. So  what the heck was yesterday's match all about ?

Considering the form of Barcelona, Manchester United should have quite easily won the match or at the least , should have dominated the proceedings. But what conspired was that they were not only reduced to counter attacking but were also forced to suffice with a meagre 35% ball possession. Add to that Ronaldo's penalty miss and what we get is a clear picture of Chokers.

Stats have it that Man Utd have been to the semifinals 9 times (prior to this year)  but all that they have managed to do is to go down 7 of those times. So maybe yesterday's performance wasn't surprising after all.

Liverpool seem to be the only English team capable of rising to the occasion but they too have faltered (albeit temporarily) this time around. Riise surely rose to the occasion (but for the wrong team) and saw to it that the second leg wouldn't be a drab 0-0 draw, which would surely have been the case had Liverpool won 1-0.

Chelsea were once again lackluster all around except for maybe Michael Ballack who showed that he doesn't belong in that unimaginative team cumulated courtesy Russian currency. Chelsea surely don't deserve to win any silverware this season and i hope Liverpool and Man United do exactly that over the week.

Based on these two matches, Liverpool deserve to win the champios league.

Manchester United, on the other hand can end the season with just the premier league title.

Chelsea can happily get rid off Avram Grant citing a feasible reason.

Barcelona and Arsenal can continue playing their fancy football albeit unsuccessfully.

p.s:- IPL match between Mumbai and Chennai was much better than all this disappointing football.

Monkey Chronicles *ing Dud(e)

"Leading a life governed only by the schedule of programs on TV" is what i am doing right now and thankfully, i ain't enjoying it.

Had i been enjoying it, i would have simply been a disgrace to myself. Having said that, just because not liking what you do doesn't let you escape from the fact that you are doing it in the first place. So, that implies that i still am a disgrace to myself.  (How can one be a disgrace to self ??!!!. I currently have no idea, i shall make it a point to bring it up the day i come to know)

Some random online dictionary describes vacation as:-

1: a respite or a time of respite from something

2: a period of exemption from work granted to an employee

3: a period spent away from home or business in travel or recreation

It is high time that some of these terms are re-defined for sloths who keep slouching all over the world these days.

Let's analyze the discrepancies of the above definition when applied to sloths a.k.a couch potatoes a.k.a douche bags a.k.a bloggers a.k.a programmers ( the last two entries may not be ideal but nevertheless, they are worth a mention).

Analysis of the above defns:-

Definition 1:- A sloth only knows how to not do anything and vacations certainly don't provide respite from that activity. If anything, they further feed the sloth's appetite for inactivity.

Definition 2:- A sloth does no work and is moreover not an employee. He is the Boss and he hardly needs any exemption from work!!

Definition 3:- A sloth never steps out of his home during vacation. So this "period" is purely fictional.

There we go, all that rubbish nonsense effectively rules out the application of that definition to a sloth. Come to think of it, I don't know why i am speaking about sloths right now especially when i have got so much to do.

Dude:- hey sloth, wassup??

Dud:- Now, why would you call me something like that. Have you been reading my blog?

Dude:- Shut up douche bag.  How dare you associate me with something as disgraceful as blogging?

Dud:- your choice of words is very singular, i must admit

Dude:- if you mean as opposed to plural, then yes it is.

Dud:- Now where did "plural" come from?$@@#@#! oh, never mind. Anyway, the one feeling which i get each each time a vacation's done is "where have all the days gone?"

Dude :- maybe you should begin your search by looking up your a** first. Too bad, it isn't as easy as Google search.

Dud:- What the heck? That was a sincere Query

Dude:- So here's a sincere Return. Stop thinking of "what was", just think about what is and what is to be

Dud:- Look who's talking. It's none other than the monkey who sold his ferrari

Dude:- LOL , up yours mate

IPL Talkies- Take 2

"Each team can field only up to four overseas players". That restriction may not be so restricting for teams like Mumbai but when it comes to Bangalore, it is indeed a mighty selection head ache.

For Delhi:- They went in to their first match with McGrath, Vettori, Geeves and Maharoof. Their squad also comprises of Shoaib Malik, Mohd Asif, Dilshan and AB de Villiers. Based on their opening match performance, common sense would suggest that they replace Vettori and Geeves with Malik and Asif. This would leave them not only with a slightly under strength batting line up but would also leave AB on the bench :( .

For Bangalore:- They arguably have the toughest decisions to make. With the overseas squad comprising of Boucher, Kallis, Misbah, Cameron White, Chanderpaul, Steyn, Ross Taylor (and couple of other players), they are sure to have a whale of a time in picking their final XI.
I would want atleast 6 of those in my team at any point of time but.... that's not what's gonna happen. So my 4 would be Boucher, Misbah, Chanderpaul and a rotation policy b/w Taylor and Steyn.

As far as the other teams go, i have no issues about them.

IPL Talkies - Day 1

Disclaimer:- It has been a long time since i've written a post and this one as a result is a bit rusty, but it surely takes the monkey off my back :)

Bangalore Royal Challengers, in reality, shouldn't be as tame as they were forced to look yesterday. They, in fact form a decent test outfit and possess the capabilities to turn the tables against any opposition (even in this format), provided the pitch assists bowling. The best way to bounce back would be to take advantage of their technical prowess, and what better way to do it than to play their home matches on seamer friendly tracks. This would not only give give Dale Steyn and company an opportunity to knock off the visitors for paltry totals but also Dravid and company some time to settle in.

These matches may then be termed as "non entertaining", but one really shouldn't mind as long as the home team keeps winning. If they continue to play their matches on such feather beds, things can only get worse (at least until Misbah and Chanderpaul join the team). The other factor which might hurt them is their stadium. The absence of big hitters amongst their ranks will prevent them from utilizing the short boundaries where as their opposition will have every opportunity to do otherwise.

Coming to the Kolkata Knight Riders, SRK should seriously consider changing his team's attire (which is anything but pleasant at the moment). They are at present, one of the three favorites to win the trophy (Hyderabad and Chennai being the other two). I personally want Delhi to do well as they have AB de Villiers in their team but having said that, one can only wonder about the number of matches he is gonna get to play because of the limit on the number of overseas players in the playing XI.

Brendon McCullum, as usual, excelled in the presence of short boundaries and keeping that in mind, he should consider moving away from Kolkata at the end of the season (as they play their home matches at Eden gardens which is.... not the smallest of stadiums) .

The non stop flow of ads (even in between the overs) is one reason why i have come to prefer football over cricket. So tonight, its gonna be BPL, not IPL (on my TV).